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For some reason i don't think asian people like me. The fact that i cant tell a chinese, from japanese from............whatever else kind there is..... probably doesnt help. but i personnaly love asians. i actually used to play on an all asian hockey team, we were the shockers and everytime we scored a goal we would do the "two in the goo one in the poo" hand gesture. the reason i mention this is to remind the three asian people that i know and talk to that yes i do like you and no im not a retard........ yet. While reading this please keep in mind I have nothing against asian people. they just dont like me.
Last night I went to dinner with my parents and wife. we went to this chinese place we usually go to. last night is what made me realize, chinese people dont like me. first we walk in and im standing there and theres this girl behind the front counter starring at me. so i smile and stare back....... she is just standing there with her hands behind her back smiling. its been about 5 minutes now and im starting to get nervous she is either dead or im starring at a card board cut out. i continue to stare waiting for a response or heatbeat. then out of the fucking clear blue "WO U LIKE A TABLE" AHHHHHHH i yell as i brace myself. to which she squeels "EEEEEEIE EEIEIE" then she starts this giggle laugh "hi hi hihihiihiih ih" WTF...... still fucking dazed from the sudden question i respond "table for 4" and she begins ripping these menus out from behind the counter, shes taking enough for a small party. and then she waves at us to follow her and her 50 menus. she sits us at this huge table and we are trying to tell her its just us 4 as he starts doing one of those drinking birds things where she bends over 500 times in a row as if showing us how to make an "r" on sesame street. apparently she feels an 8 seater table is good for 4 people. so we sit down and she lays out all this silverware and all these menus to which i again point out "THERES ONLY 4 OF US" more of the letter "r" is given in response. fine. we will eat here. next comes the water guy. apparently his only job is to fill your water glass when it is empty, he is not very good at his job. he is best represented by this -------> :all_cohol only without the wideness in eyes. it seemed more like he was trying to sleep than serve anyone and he was partacing in a bottle of something that wasnt written in english. eventually he makes his way over and fills the 8 glasses of water. again i shake my head. he comes over and says something to me that resembled........well.... mumushuyetramumu, im like "what?" and again he repeats it. so again i say "what?" and again he repeats it. to which i again say........."what?" we stare at each other for a few seconds and he busts out in this smile, bows and leaves. grand. next come the 4 baskets of friend noodles, again we mention "just the 4 of us". doesnt matter. now comes the part where i realize they dont like me. the waitress comes jogging over and says "ORDA ORDA ORDA" so we all order our food, which is spicey. we wait alittle and eventually the food comes out. i begin eating it and immediately need some water. i love spicey food but this shit was trying to kill me. only problem is im out of water. i look for the water guy and signal for more water. apon seeing this he puts down his only responsibility (the water) and comes over as if im going to shoot the shit with him. im very visibly in distress and in need of water. im pointing at my glass and sweating, how that would represent duck sauce i'll never know. he shakes his head, bows, and leaves. a moment of two passes as i breathe heavily and he returns with, duck sauce.... i stop hyperventilating long enough to give him this look like "moron" and then continue sweating and trying to spit on my own fire in my mouth. i begin making signs of pouring water into the glass and saying water, and this point my parents join in and begin telling "WATER HE NEEDS WATER" to which he becomes distressed, probably from the drinking he was doing earlier. he now begins rubbing his hands and trying to say something. I DONT KNOW CHINESE. at this point im holding the glass in his face saying WATER WATER WATER. which is making me realize HE DOESNT UNDERSTAND ENGLISH. he then does the bow thing and leaves again only to come back with our waitress. "PRABLEM?" she says loudly and sharply. WATER FOR FUKES SAKE GIVE ME SOME FUCKING WATER i say nicely back. "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO yu eat *whatever that word was* yu no eat dem. very too hot" she replies. NO FUCKIGN SHIT LADY IM IN NEED OF WATER GIVE ME THE FUCKING WATER. "i get yu wader" she finally says. YES, THANK GOD IM FINALLY GETTING SOME WATER. she turns to captain ping pong and tells him to get the water to which he acts relieved and gets the water. i drink the water. he leaves. my glass is now empty again. *sigh*. my meal is riddled with this little red things of death and not soon after the whole order did i eat another one. at this point i dont even care. im sucking on duck sauce to numb the pain and trying to suck on ice cubes. we all finish our meals (im still without water and dying) and the waitress comes back to get our plates and notices i didnt eat my egg roll. "YOU WANT" she yells. NO i need more water please, i reply. she turns to laur "YOU WANT". No i think he needs water she replies. the waitress then does this to my mom and dad who also recommend the bringing of water. finally she says "NO ONE WANT?!" and i just burst out "I WAN WADER. BRING ME WADERRRRRRRRRRRRRR WAAAAAAADERRRRRRRRR" to which she starts a shit storm in chinese and barrels off. more good. finally she returns with the check, and no water. we quickly pay and begin getting up. as i get up the stupid asshole comes over with water and fills my glass and smiles at me. i hate him.
Everynow and then Laur goes to get her nails done. the place she goes is at a local mall so while she is getting them done i go off and come back later. EVERYTIME i walk into the place i here TING BOP WANG HUU FOO GUY as they all look at me and start laughing. i check my fly, its up. no food on my face. no missing body parts. what the fuck is so funny. they always laugh so fucking hard "A TEE HEE HEE HEE" as im sitting there waiting. fucking pisses me off to no extent. and theres also this guy that works at one of them. he stares at me as well......... i dunno if he wants to do my nails or put or put a file through my head. one day im gonna walk in dressed as a ninja. see how funny they think that is. give the ninja a pedicure bitch. no matter who else is in the place they ALWAYS stare at me and talk about me. they dont think its so funny when i start talking back, even though i dont know what im saying "FA ME SHUSHUSHUSHU WING DAP FOO TOO YOU TOO" assholes. #4 with pork fried rice. YOU WANT MILLION DOLLA?! assholes.
theres this "performance" shop near me, its more like a civic store but anyways. i went in there for a price on eibach ground control lowering springs. i walk in and ask the kid how much for a set of eibachs. the kid says eibach is shit tein is much better. i tell him tein is shit and i asked about eibachs. he starts laughing at me says "eibach?! they for ricers" .......... while he has the JDM Type R badge on a necklace. Everytime i go in there they act like im not worthy of the Mugen shift knob or the four thousand rainbow colored badges they sell.
and lastly, one time i was driving through a shopping center and this asian kid in a riced up accord gives me the thumbs down and tried revving and acting hard. so i pulled my eyes back and smiled at him. he didnt like that. but i felt it necesarry.
I've already talked to HtheDuck and he agreed to come to the nail salon with me so he can tell me what they are saying about me. im finally going to have my vengence!
Last night I went to dinner with my parents and wife. we went to this chinese place we usually go to. last night is what made me realize, chinese people dont like me. first we walk in and im standing there and theres this girl behind the front counter starring at me. so i smile and stare back....... she is just standing there with her hands behind her back smiling. its been about 5 minutes now and im starting to get nervous she is either dead or im starring at a card board cut out. i continue to stare waiting for a response or heatbeat. then out of the fucking clear blue "WO U LIKE A TABLE" AHHHHHHH i yell as i brace myself. to which she squeels "EEEEEEIE EEIEIE" then she starts this giggle laugh "hi hi hihihiihiih ih" WTF...... still fucking dazed from the sudden question i respond "table for 4" and she begins ripping these menus out from behind the counter, shes taking enough for a small party. and then she waves at us to follow her and her 50 menus. she sits us at this huge table and we are trying to tell her its just us 4 as he starts doing one of those drinking birds things where she bends over 500 times in a row as if showing us how to make an "r" on sesame street. apparently she feels an 8 seater table is good for 4 people. so we sit down and she lays out all this silverware and all these menus to which i again point out "THERES ONLY 4 OF US" more of the letter "r" is given in response. fine. we will eat here. next comes the water guy. apparently his only job is to fill your water glass when it is empty, he is not very good at his job. he is best represented by this -------> :all_cohol only without the wideness in eyes. it seemed more like he was trying to sleep than serve anyone and he was partacing in a bottle of something that wasnt written in english. eventually he makes his way over and fills the 8 glasses of water. again i shake my head. he comes over and says something to me that resembled........well.... mumushuyetramumu, im like "what?" and again he repeats it. so again i say "what?" and again he repeats it. to which i again say........."what?" we stare at each other for a few seconds and he busts out in this smile, bows and leaves. grand. next come the 4 baskets of friend noodles, again we mention "just the 4 of us". doesnt matter. now comes the part where i realize they dont like me. the waitress comes jogging over and says "ORDA ORDA ORDA" so we all order our food, which is spicey. we wait alittle and eventually the food comes out. i begin eating it and immediately need some water. i love spicey food but this shit was trying to kill me. only problem is im out of water. i look for the water guy and signal for more water. apon seeing this he puts down his only responsibility (the water) and comes over as if im going to shoot the shit with him. im very visibly in distress and in need of water. im pointing at my glass and sweating, how that would represent duck sauce i'll never know. he shakes his head, bows, and leaves. a moment of two passes as i breathe heavily and he returns with, duck sauce.... i stop hyperventilating long enough to give him this look like "moron" and then continue sweating and trying to spit on my own fire in my mouth. i begin making signs of pouring water into the glass and saying water, and this point my parents join in and begin telling "WATER HE NEEDS WATER" to which he becomes distressed, probably from the drinking he was doing earlier. he now begins rubbing his hands and trying to say something. I DONT KNOW CHINESE. at this point im holding the glass in his face saying WATER WATER WATER. which is making me realize HE DOESNT UNDERSTAND ENGLISH. he then does the bow thing and leaves again only to come back with our waitress. "PRABLEM?" she says loudly and sharply. WATER FOR FUKES SAKE GIVE ME SOME FUCKING WATER i say nicely back. "OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO yu eat *whatever that word was* yu no eat dem. very too hot" she replies. NO FUCKIGN SHIT LADY IM IN NEED OF WATER GIVE ME THE FUCKING WATER. "i get yu wader" she finally says. YES, THANK GOD IM FINALLY GETTING SOME WATER. she turns to captain ping pong and tells him to get the water to which he acts relieved and gets the water. i drink the water. he leaves. my glass is now empty again. *sigh*. my meal is riddled with this little red things of death and not soon after the whole order did i eat another one. at this point i dont even care. im sucking on duck sauce to numb the pain and trying to suck on ice cubes. we all finish our meals (im still without water and dying) and the waitress comes back to get our plates and notices i didnt eat my egg roll. "YOU WANT" she yells. NO i need more water please, i reply. she turns to laur "YOU WANT". No i think he needs water she replies. the waitress then does this to my mom and dad who also recommend the bringing of water. finally she says "NO ONE WANT?!" and i just burst out "I WAN WADER. BRING ME WADERRRRRRRRRRRRRR WAAAAAAADERRRRRRRRR" to which she starts a shit storm in chinese and barrels off. more good. finally she returns with the check, and no water. we quickly pay and begin getting up. as i get up the stupid asshole comes over with water and fills my glass and smiles at me. i hate him.
Everynow and then Laur goes to get her nails done. the place she goes is at a local mall so while she is getting them done i go off and come back later. EVERYTIME i walk into the place i here TING BOP WANG HUU FOO GUY as they all look at me and start laughing. i check my fly, its up. no food on my face. no missing body parts. what the fuck is so funny. they always laugh so fucking hard "A TEE HEE HEE HEE" as im sitting there waiting. fucking pisses me off to no extent. and theres also this guy that works at one of them. he stares at me as well......... i dunno if he wants to do my nails or put or put a file through my head. one day im gonna walk in dressed as a ninja. see how funny they think that is. give the ninja a pedicure bitch. no matter who else is in the place they ALWAYS stare at me and talk about me. they dont think its so funny when i start talking back, even though i dont know what im saying "FA ME SHUSHUSHUSHU WING DAP FOO TOO YOU TOO" assholes. #4 with pork fried rice. YOU WANT MILLION DOLLA?! assholes.
theres this "performance" shop near me, its more like a civic store but anyways. i went in there for a price on eibach ground control lowering springs. i walk in and ask the kid how much for a set of eibachs. the kid says eibach is shit tein is much better. i tell him tein is shit and i asked about eibachs. he starts laughing at me says "eibach?! they for ricers" .......... while he has the JDM Type R badge on a necklace. Everytime i go in there they act like im not worthy of the Mugen shift knob or the four thousand rainbow colored badges they sell.
and lastly, one time i was driving through a shopping center and this asian kid in a riced up accord gives me the thumbs down and tried revving and acting hard. so i pulled my eyes back and smiled at him. he didnt like that. but i felt it necesarry.
I've already talked to HtheDuck and he agreed to come to the nail salon with me so he can tell me what they are saying about me. im finally going to have my vengence!
